Wednesday, January 20, 2010


Hey there-

Yesterday at dinner Mike and I were discussing an event that involved our friend, Bob.

"Who?" Henry asked. "Bob? Our dad is back? He's alive again?"

Of course, he knows the truth, he was just being silly.

"Wouldn't that be wonderful?" I asked. "He could move back in here with all of us."

Mike chuckled from the other side of the table.

"Your mom could be the first woman polygamist, Henry," he said.

This brought on a very interesting conversation about polygamy that I won't go into now, but it got me thinking.........

What if Bob were to arrive at my doorstep, and I was to discover that his absence the last six years had just been some terrible mistake?

Then what?!

I would be thrilled of course, I can almost feel his arms around me as I type this, and the sound of his voice greeting me; "Hey Sug"

After the shock of seeing me in a house with 5 children wore off I would call for the boys.

"Daddy's home!" I would say, just like I did many times before.

Henry would be shy at first, stare at him with reserved awe, and then want to show Bob his bicycle and how well he can play Othello. Arthur would probably bound into Bob's arms, even though he wouldn't really know who this man was, it might be similar to Santa coming alive in our house for Arthur.

Then Mike would appear at the door to see what all the commotion was about.

hmmmmmm, that is when it gets sticky.

Now what?

Would I run back to Bob and leave everything that Mike and I have built together?

I couldn't do that.

Would I stay with Mike and arrange a visiting schedule for the boys with Bob?

Nope, that doesn't sound good either.

I don't see any of us going for a plural marriage, I can't see Mike and Bob as "brother husbands". And me deciding which door to knock on at night?! ICK! (maybe I have been watching too much Big Love)

How could I decide? Bob is the boys dad, obviously, but they are rather attached to Mike by this point. Mike can even make a better smoothie than me according to Arthur (trader!). Mike never complains about his job but he also doesn't have the summers off like Bob did as a teacher. They both like camping and cooking, although Bob did a lot more of it. Bob never brought me chai in bed, but he made one for me every morning. They both like to travel. Bob was more frugal (which I like) but he never brought me home gifts for no reason. Bob and my wine budget was much less but I do enjoy a good glass of red wine before dinner. Mike is always up for going out with people but, Mike is always up for going out with people.They both put up with me and love me in totally different ways.

Wow, I am glad I won't ever have to decide ......(maybe?).

How lucky am I to have had the chance to love and be loved by two such wonderful men? How lucky am I that, after everything, I still feel lucky?

Thanks for checking in-



  1. Henry as Othello? I can well imagine this! Does this mean he is reading Shakespeare (at the ripe old age of 9 years)? If there is ever a performance, please invite me. Love to all of you.

  2. Kathryn,

    I meant the game Othello not the character. I wish he was reading Shakespeare. He could play Othello I bet.

    Sorry for the confusion.